Moral formation in children requires both sides: teaching them to love what is good and to recognize and refuse what is cruel, dishonest, or degrading. Some parents emphasize only the positive—'be kind, be nice'—without teaching discernment about what to resist. Others are heavy on rules and warnings without cultivating genuine delight in goodness. Confucius implies that a fully formed person needs both: a heart that lights up at kindness and justice, and a conscience that recoils from cruelty and deceit. Parents build this by celebrating acts of genuine goodness when they see them, and by clearly naming harmful behavior without euphemism: 'That was unkind, and unkindness is not what we stand for.'